Just another day in Paradise

Good morning everyone! Today I am not leaving the house. I was very sore last night and actually had to take Tylenol. I did too much yesterday (again) and felt very bad by 8ish. I was quite pathetic and weepy and that is not my nature. Crying isn't my thing.

I did reward myself with new sheets yesterday. 650 thread count...all washed and smelling like a combination of new born babies, heaven and puppy breath. I can't wait to make my bed and sleep in it tonight! Did I already mention that I bought a gorgeous white cotton quilt. Yay!

By the way, I understand that the photos of my breast are very alluring and practically pornographic but please view them respectfully. I am sure all you filthy minded viewers could find a photo of a naked breast on the Internet if you look very hard. You may even find one where you can see a nipple, or a pair of breasts.  Better yet, you may find some that are not 40 years old, spent 2.5 years feeding a child, bruised and scarred. If you need help just let me know...(yup sarcasm intended).

If you didn't book your mammogram yet....please do so! It's bad enough we have to write and read my shitty blog about cancer. Let's be proactive and prevent cancer...hence, bad blogging .

Hugs and kisses to you all. Thank you again for all the constant prayers, warm thoughtful messages and love I receive from you every day. I don't respond to everyone but read and listen to everything. I love you all.

Cheers
Jeannie

THE RESULTS ARE BACK!

I have to do stuff but awesome news...the margins that were removed around the tumor were free of cancer cells and so was the sentinel node.  Gotta go but a celebration is in order!  Wooooo......Hoooooo!

Up yours cancer!

I feel ouchies today - One week later

My breast hurts today. Perhaps I have been over exerting myself or it's completely normal. I had sore ribs and knees last night. I am tired and have a sneaky suspicion that I may get a cold. I am gobbling up zinc lozenges in the hopes of keeping it at bay. Cancer doesn't scare me but colds do. I get the complete horrors of getting a cold or God forbid, the flu. My scar looks a lot better though. I started using pure vitamin E very liberally on it several times a day. Deborah gave be Bio Oil to use as well. I will be curious to see how well it fades out as I tend to scar very easily. Anyway, here's another boob shot. I think it is healing well.

Day 5 - post-op pictures

Hurrah today I can remove my steri-strips! Umm, yes I did remove them last night. They made me so itchy.    As you can see I made it through the night and my insides stayed put. I don't know if the bruising is from surgery or from 'over doing it'. Anyway, it feels great and I am sure in another week it will be back to normal. So here is the fun part - my scars! You know you want to look :o

The top cut just under my armpit is the location where the sentinel node was removed. Remember, this is a relatively new procedure used to avoid randomly removing lymph nodes that may or may not be affected by cancer.  The sentinel node is the initial node that will be fed by the cancer cells. If that isn't affected, then the nodes beyond that will be clean also.

Similar shot to below..the longer scar is from the partial mastectomy.

Shooting my own breast while hiding my nipple is hard

Day Four - Post Op

I am completely bored out of my mind. Although I feel completely fine, pain-free and full of energy I am not supposed to do anything. I tried retail therapy yesterday to wear myself out but it only allowed for a one hour nap. I am completely caught up with Coronation Street. The house is organized.

So, here's the deal. I will do light work for you if you want to do heavy work for me. For instance, I can do your laundry, dishes, organize your closets if you can chop and pile my campfire wood or walk my dogs. Deal?

BTW, tomorrow is soak the bandage off day. I am so bloody excited. Since I have nothing interesting to share here is an updated picture of the boob.

Day 2 Post-Op

I have read so many nice posts, messages,  texts and comments about my positive attitude and determination to beat cancer.  I do have to say that not once since my diagnosis did I waiver in my thinking that perhaps I may not be okay.  Don't get me wrong.  I never said everything would work out perfectly, just that I would be okay.  Of course, my version of okay and someone else's version may differ. 

I absolutely cannot believe how well I feel today.  I don't hurt at all.  Not one little bit.  I am full of energy, enough to get me in trouble, and completely pain free.  I haven't felt this well in a long, long time.  I wonder if my body was telling me something for the last two years.  Now that the tumor is out I suddenly feel awesome.  Maybe it's just all in my mind but that's okay too.

By the way, most of you know I don't cry very often.  I haven't cried for a single moment about this little bump in my life.  However, I had a little jag in the surgery on Wednesday.  I cried over a needle.  Yup, a needle.  After all the needles and tests, one needle in my hand sent me over the edge.  There was some yelling and cursing and then a big cry.  OMG - it hurt so bad.  I tried to get off the table and told them I was going home.  LOL.  I was a little embarrassed when I saw Dr. MacMullin yesterday.  I apologized but he said there was no need and that everyone thought I was great. 

Anyway, if you are like me, you probably want to see the incision.  It is currently glued closed and steri-stripped but here is a picture anyway.  In three more days I can soak off the strips and we can all have a good gawk at it.  As for the position of my breasts, they look normal in a bra and a top but without either I am very lopsided and very obvious that I had a large piece of tissue removed. 

So, that's my update for today.  Thanks to everyone for the prayers, best wishes, food, flowers and messages of love.

Cheers
Jeannie

Day two - post op Sept 23, 2011

Freedom...Sweet Freedom!

It's 9:24 am, Thursday, September 22nd and I am HOME.  My surgery went great...I feel great.  I had a room to myself in the maternity ward.  I would forget that I was in hospital and wonder why I could hear so many kittens crying.  Then a baby would wail like it was caught in a meat grinder and I'd remember where I was. 

I think my scar is about 6" long but I can't really tell.  In five days I can soak the strips off and see it.  I'll take a pic so you can all get a look at it.  It is a horizontal scar that runs approximately two inches from my center toward my armpit.

Well I just wanted you all to know I feel terrific but a little tired.  I'm going to have a nap in my own bed.  I need to be well rested to boss Hannah around while I'm training her to help me with the company :)

Cheers

Jeannie

The Day has Come

Well this is it.  I have been awake for 30 minutes and I'm already gasping for water.  I usually drink a liter in the morning.  So I have 1 hour 30 minutes to kill.  Maybe I will take a long bath...let the twins float around for a bit.  They may not be allowed to swim for a few days after the surgery.  I'm really tired and feeling a bit anxious.  I don't know why I'm anxious. It is nothing that can be pinpointed.  Oh well, I'll be as high as two hippies soon enough.  Also, for information purposes, I am very slow to come back from sedation.  I must really enjoy it and it takes many hours to wake me sometimes.  If you hear nothing for a long time that is why.  Well, I guess I should pack a few things and make sure all my technological gear is fully charged because I see many hours of boredom in the near future.  I need to give the dogs a nice cuddle and create the worlds longest "Honey-to-Do" List for Hannah and Chris before I go.  I don't want them to be bored - lol. Enjoy your day and think of me as I will look after surgery.  Walking around all lopsided :o)

Cheers
Jeannie

PS.  Not to sound like a horrible cow but I don't want visitors okay.  I will need the constant-interuptions-of-the-staff-at-the-hospital-rest-time.  When I get home I will post (someone will post) when I am ready for phone calls and visits.  You are certainly welcome to call the house and talk to Hannah or Chris for an update.  They will be pleased to update you.  However, if they ask if you can come and help remove the chains from their ankles and locks off the doors  - Just say NO.

Pre-surgery Day

Well just about one day until I may be cancer-free!  Today's appointment was a lot different than I expected.  I somehow imagined that I would be able to see giant vats of blue dye, radiation hazard signs, people walking around in white protective gear breathing through gas masks.  Nope.  Nothing like that at all.

I climbed on a table and exposed the yucky boob minus my nipple as I didn't think he needed to see that.  The doctor walked in wearing a regular shirt.  He introduced himself, shook my hand and then jabbed four needles in my breast - one in my nip.  Guess hiding it didn't help.  He knew just where to find it.

It was painless though!  Hurrah

Unfortunately, the mammogram machine broke down so I had the pleasure of seeing my tumor on the ultrasound machine.  The dirty little bastard. Just hanging around having a time in my mammary!  I wanted to ask for a picture but forgot.  I would have let you all see the little shit before he is chopped out tomorrow. 

So, here's tomorrows schedule:

8:00 - Go to admitting dept.

8ish - Go to day surgery dept.

9ish:  Take the ride of shame (healthy woman taken by stretcher through hospital) to Ultrasound

9ish - Ultrasound for needle localization

Between 10ish and 12ish:  Reverse ride of shame back to surgery.  This time with inverted styrofoam cup over metal sticking out of breast. Must remember to wear a Burka tomorrow.

12:30 - surgery; where both the quadrant of breast tissue and the sentinel node will be removed. My personal body parts will be sent away for testing...results in two weeks.

I have an overnighter and go home FIRST THING IN THE MORNING...

Hear me MacMullin...First thing :)

So that's everything for today.  I'm going to do some more work and then go out this evening per my Tuesday evening ritual.  Enjoy your evening everyone!

Cheers...and lots of hugs too
Jeannie





PRE-ADMISSION DAY

Well I have to say that in spite of all the negativity you hear about waiting time at the hospital, I had no waiting at all.  I showed up during 'coffee break' but was lucky enough to meet with the 'pharmacy lady' and have a good gab about all my personal health stats.  When we finished, thinking very proactively, she plopped me down in another waiting room and registered me for my EKG. That took about 10 minutes. I went back to the pre-admin area, had another nice long chat with a nurse about my surgery and after care.  We discussed just about everything I would need to know before and after the procedures.

For those of you who may have to have an operation here is a sampling of my questions:

Q.  How long is the surgery? 
A.  About one hour from anesthesia time to clean up.

Q.  Will I be breathing on my own or will a machine breath for me during the surgery?
A.  A machine will do the breathing.  You will be paralyzed.

Q.  If I have no muscle control, will I poop on the table?
A.  Umm, no, but good question.

Q.  I will be on my period during the surgery.  Tampon or pad?
A.  Pad.

Q.  Can I see the tumor?
A.  Wellllllll, umm, I believe it has to be shipped immediately to the Path lab in Halifax.  You better ask your surgeon.

Don't be afraid to ask questions.  They hear it all. 

So, after that we discuss the procedure I will be having on Monday...never a dull day with cancer.  Anyway, it is called a Sentinel Node Biopsy. 

Q.  Will it hurt?
A.  Yes.

I don't want to give you all boredom cancer by describing the procedure so here is a link if you want to read about it.  I'll be pissing blue urine for a day or so. I will have a blue boob as well...I'm considering doing a fund raiser by letting people touch my blue radioactive breast for money.  Hannah, my daughter, didn't think her father would approve.  I told her I wouldn't charge him full rate. 

http://www.cancer.gov/cancertopics/factsheet/detection/sentinel-node-biopsy

After that I had a chest x-ray and blood tests.  The blood test really hurt but I totally took advantage and set the chair up as a recliner.  She commented that most people don't choose that area to relax.  I said 'shhhh'...I need a few seconds to relax. I was in the hospital less than three hours but I was completely exhausted.  I think I was oxygen deprived from holding my breath most of the time.  I was terrified of picking up germs at the hospital.  Today's fear was SARS...I washed my hands about 12 times while I was there and used so much alcohol rub that I believe I transdermally intoxicated myself.

Well, that's all I will tell you today.  I'll describe Tuesday's magic show in more detail and give you a picture of the node surgery when I get a chance on Monday.  I'm going to have a snuggle with the pups for a bit and then hit the sack. 

If you haven't booked your screening or follow up mammograms, do it now.  The pretty pink comfort pillow they give you isn't worth the inconvenience of giving up a year of your life..

Happy Friday evening
Cheers
Jeannie

Da, da, da, da.......The Results

Good afternoon everyone
To begin let me thank Evan Perry for typing out the words to Little Jeannie yesterday, especially since Elton didn't sing it last night.  Also, hurry up with my fudge.  Vanilla Praline please.

Also, Lee Tibbo, you know I don't wash my hands on Wednesdays so the answer is no, I didn't wash them.  I think you should be as dirty as possible when you go to the hospital to keep from attracting new bugs. I absolutely love the idea of attaching a shit collector to Kimora. I will certainly be looking for one of those.

On a more serious note I just returned from Dr. MacMullin's office.  He rejected my request to bump my surgery date to January.  He also rejected my request to have a breast reduction performed at the same time. So, I guess keeping me alive is pretty important to him.  So much so he will be operating on me September 21, 2011....Yup, one week from now.  I felt like he punched me in the stomach.  He said the 21st and I thought he meant November or possibly October.  Anyway, no big deal.  I have a bunch of testing this week and then the surgery. Then a two week break while we wait for the pathology reports to come back.  Only then will a decision be made to how much treatment will be required. Cross your fingers its only the month worth of radiation. Oh, he also mentioned losing 25% of my breast won't make a dent in it. It won't even be noticable.  That's pretty cool. 

So my little pumpkins, don't fret.  I will be practically cancer free in one week.  Hurrah!

Let's plan a night out soon. 

Cheers
Jeannie

PS.  Don't forget to book your mammograms :o)

Holy Sh*t!

Good morning everyone and welcome to "I'm going to see Elton John in concert" Tuesday :o)

Just a few things to mention today.  First, I would like to give you the contact information for the Nova Scotia Breast Screening Program.

www.breastscreening.ns.ca

1-800-565-0548

1-902-473-3960

Book your appointment today!

As most of you know, I have three dogs...three dogs who think they are people.  Kimora, my youngest and least intelligent pup, has a problem with her bottom.  She had her anal glands removed and now just drops bits of poop randomly.  Or worse, doesn't quite finish the job and leaves it hanging.  So after using my linen comforter as toilet tissue three times we decided she could do the poop-scoot-boogie on a cheap rug downstairs from now on.  I was also a bit worried that after my surgery, she would walk on me when I was sleeping because, to be honest, she walks on me when I'm sleeping. So, we declared the upstairs a fur-free zone. We installed a baby gate at the top of the stairs.  No dogs allowed on the second floor.  Instantly, my housework is cut in half.  We can all sleep comfortably instead of like the letter X or worse, the letter Z.  The best was getting up this morning and not having dog fur in my retainer.  Ahh, I can envision Egyption cotton sheets and a crisp white throw on my bed already...   (FYI.Queen size...wink)

So, last night went pretty good.  Scruffy cried half the night (which I ignored) and Kimora whimpered a lot (which I ignored).  In hindsight I probably should have paid attention to Kimora's whimpering.  I'm not sure of the square footage of my house so to give an accurate ratio of shit to surface area won't be accurate.  However, I can honestly say that she did a pretty damn good job of producing enough to cover most of the downstairs area.  She was kind enough to spread it around, ensuring all floors and rugs were well covered.  Bless her little heart.  She didn't want me to work too hard in one spot.  She may be wearing one of her diapers tonight!  She's lucky she's really damn cute!

Have a great day...get out and enjoy the sun. 

Cheers

Jeannie

Lil Fix

Good morning everyone
First let me say thank you to everyone who has sent message of hope and inspiration to me over the past few days.  It's lovely to have great people like you in my life....

Second, I fixed the problem with the posting.  Anyone can post now. 

Enjoy this beautiful day!

Cheers
Jeannie

PS.  If you are 40 or over and didn't have a screening mammogram make your appointment today.  

In the beginning...

Take it from me, be careful what you wish for!  For the last year or so I have been wishing away my breasts.  I was constantly muttering, 'God, I wish I could get these reduced', 'God, I wish I was flat chested', 'God, why didn't you spread the family mammaries out evenly between my sister and I' (her:  'A' cup me:  'F' cup)...Anyway, see what I'm saying.

So, I make a visit to Dr. Crosby because I have a sore spot on my left breast.  It turns out that it is the muscle buried under the breast that was sore.  Hurrah...however, I'm 40 so a mammagram it is.  Long story short, after a few phone calls and a core biopsy I was diagnosed with Infiltrating Ductal Carcinoma, nuclear grade 2 (right breast).  Basically, it is cancer that started in the milk duct and continued to grow and spread into other breast tissue.  To save everyone the pain of looking up every term I added a short list of the terms I already had exposure to (look down).

So, September 14th I see Dr. MacMullin.  He is the surgeon who will chop out the tumor and the surrounding tissue.  If memory serves me correctly, I believe I will be losing about 25% of the breast. 

So, I will update after my doctor appointment on Wednesday and give all the nasty details.  Wish me luck!